I'm already well
on my way to Saint Angeles. I didn't go into detail in my last entry so I'll
explain now. John, the man who saved me, talked about his past on request. I
asked because most of the people I met in the past either wanted me dead or
wanted something from me and they especially didn't help me out of pure kindness.
He'd lived almost his entire life in this small cabin. Once he became a young
man, he moved away from society and built this cabin with his bare hands. He
loved people, but preferred a life of solitude surrounded by nature's wild
life. He was by no means a hippy or nutcase so don't get the wrong idea. I've
known people in my life that loved animals and plants and the rare beauty that
in his words "has gone unchanged or destroyed by time". Surprisingly
enough, he met a woman. She lived in a cabin as well about 2 miles from John's.
They came upon each other in their gathering and hunting. He eventually moved
into her cabin and together had a daughter named Jane. The daughter left to
start her own travels when she was of age. She's been gone for six years, but
she did send a few messages to John by way of a friend visiting the cabin.
John's wife passed away in her sleep about three years ago for unknown reasons.
As John said, she "entered this world peacefully and left in a peaceful
silence." Soon after, he locked up his wife's cabin and moved back into
his old cabin (he suggested that I could live there if I wanted, but I
declined). He continued to live as he previously did and knew nothing of the
horrors happening in the world until the messager stopped coming and he saw a
lost soul for the first time.
I asked how he
could go on living his life without a purpose. He was shocked and offended by
this question. He gave his answer. "Isn't living good enough? Isn't there
purpose in happiness and in breathing a breath? So many people spend their
lives in misery and will continue to do so no matter what you tell them. I'm
merely balancing the scale by being satisfied with taking care of my life and
smiling. And who are you to judge my life to have no purpose, a man who fell at
my doorsteps, pleading for help? Without me, you probably would have died. If
that is what you mean by purpose then yes, I have a purpose. When I came out
here, I never expected to meet a woman, make her happy, make a child with her,
raise her up right, but I did. You do not always find purpose, purpose finds
you and let it find you prepared and willing!"
I apologized to
John and he accepted it. I suppose I could have summed up his speech, but I
consider it something that should be remember and not just to die with the two of
us. We talked more and I revealed my past. The talking made the time pass by
very fast. I nearly ready to leave when I brought up the question as to why he
didn't leave to find his daughter. I already had a few ideas as to why and it
turned out I was right.
"What
happens if I leave here and Jane comes back to an empty cabin? I am long passed
my prime and as much as I would like to find her, getting killed in the process
won't save her and will only sadden her if she found out that happened to me.
She'd have no one left in the world or at least from this world. Still, I often
find myself wondering whether I should try."
And that is why I
am now off to Saint Angeles. The last message he received from her was that she
was living there. He didn't ask me or intend to suggest that I go, but he knew
I was going to try and bring her back. I couldn't agree with everything in his
philosophy, but he was right: purpose does find you.
- Jack's Diary
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