Jack's Diary - Lost in Memories - Day 49

     Well, I suppose things could have turned out worse. There could’ve been three people dead instead of one, but that thought doesn’t help boost everyone’s mood, especially Mike’s. I even tried to engage Mike in conversation to no avail on our way to the Valor’s base. He's stop talking for the most part and has basically stopped doing anything except breath. He has the same mood about him that I had after I lost Jane. I just hope he bounces back after some time and I hope he doesn't turn into someone like me. The world doesn't need another killer.

     It was my assumption that the paper we were delivering was the package. However, it turned out only to be a release slip for us to receive the real package: a young girl. It would’ve been nice to know this ahead of time (in which case, I may have chosen not to come). I don't want to be held responsible for someone else's life, especially a stranger's. What’s worse, the girl looked and acted a lot like Lexi and I could see Mike wasn’t happy with the thought of having this reminder with us, but I didn’t want to argue or decline the job since we knew nothing about the Valor’s “temperament” or how many men they had. There’s been enough death so I said we’d take the job despite Mike’s disapproval. The girl and Mike got into an argument about traveling with us, with Mike ending it, giving her the cold shoulder. I decided to stay out of it. Words won't help us.

     We set up camp nearby before heading out tomorrow. Ann and Jess talked inside the tent while I saw Mike sitting alone. The girl for some reason decide to start a conversation with me.

     "What the hell is that grumpy old man's problem?" she asked me.

     I paused for a moment. "Could be that in the first 10 seconds that we met you, you've cursed and complained to us."

     "So what. You have to put up with me. It's your job."

     "No. Our job is to get you there alive. Whether or not you want your vocal cords cut out relies completely on your behavior. Understand?"

     A look of shock came to her face. "You wouldn't..."

     "I can do far worse. Though you'd have to push me pretty far." The look remained on her face. "Relax. I only said that to shut you up. Mike would never let me."

     "Who's Mike?" she asked.

     "The guy you were complaining about before. He's usually in a better mood, but just before we came here, we lost one of our traveling companions so you might want to give him a break. She actually looked a lot like you."

     "One of your friends gets killed and I'm suppose to trust you with my life? How comforting," she says sarcastically.

     "You don't have much choice, do you? Besides, her and Mike went ahead alone to reach the Valor's base. Had we all been there, things might have turned out different."

     "Doubt it. You all look like a bunch of push overs," she said.

     I took out a knife and threw it at a tree nearly thirty feet away, the blade digging into the bark. Her eyes got wide when she saw me taking it out (she probably thought I was going to use it on her). I thought a small demonstration would accomplish more than words alone. "So, enough about me. Tell me about yourself. What's your name?"

     She still had a scared complexion on her face when she tried to talk, "My knife, I mean, my name is Julie."

     I asked her more about herself, like what things in life she liked, her past, and what she hoped for in the future. As the conversation went on, she became less afraid and more comfortable as I shared my experiences. I don't mind the idea of someone finding and reading this journal one day in the future since my life is an open book for anyone to learn about. That's part of the reason why I'm writing it, in the hopes that it will do someone some good, but Julie's thoughts and dreams are hers alone and I won't reveal the personal pieces here. However, I eventually managed to switch the conversation over to her time at the Valor's base.

     "A patrol group scavenging for supplies found me looting a covalence store for food." Julie told me. "They promised me food and a place to sleep if I went with them. I was already starving at the time and I hadn't slept in two days so I went with them. I didn't have anywhere else to go so I stayed with them for about three months and now they want to ship me out to another base like a package."

     "Did they mistreat you at all?" I asked.

     "No, but they didn't really pay attention to me that much. Only a few people stopped what they were doing to talk with me, only to get yelled at by the boss to get back to work."

     "Do you know anything about the base we're taking you to?"

     "I just told you they hardly said a word to me. This whole trip was a surprise to me and I hate it."

     "Well, you can look at the bright side. If it's a kid's camp, there will probably be kids around your age to talk to."

     "I don't care. I don't like being out here in the open. It's not safe. And who says I'd want to talk with the other kids? They're all probably jerks. What if someone there tries to kill me?"

     I paused for a moment (I seem to be doing a lot of that). "You didn't really think I was going to drop you off and leave, did you?" Julie gave me a strange look. "I can't speak for the others, but if I can see that things are just as bad as you imagine, I'm not going to leave you there."

     "Won't the Valors kill you if you don't get me there?"

     "Not if I kill them first." I dug into my bag and took out a knife and handed it to her. "Keep it with you all the time. You might need it."

     She smiled and took it. We stayed up a little longer talking about knives; where and how to conceal and use them. She eventually left to go to her tent. Everyone else was in their tents except for me and Mike. I walked over to the tree I threw my knife at and retrieved it. I said goodnight to Mike, but it didn't even seem like he noticed me. Lost in memories, perhaps?

     I really hope that the base turns out to be fine. As exciting as it would be, I don't want to start a battle with the Valors; too much risk in someone on my side getting killed. Besides, from what I've heard about the Valors, they seem like okay people; definitely better than the red and blue group. There's no need for good people to die.

     One last thing I guess I should mention. The entire time I was talking to Julie, it felt like someone was watching me. Before going into my tent, I thought I saw Ann head sticking out of the entrance to her tent watching me. As soon as I turned my direct vision to her tent, I didn't see her. 

- Jack's Diary