Jack's Diary - You've Been Warned - Day 64

(I know the next entry is going to sound crazy and I wouldn’t blame you for not believing me, but I’m telling you this happened. Read at your own risk.)

            I spent most of the next day lying on my bed in a dreamless solitude. I wasn’t tired or even hungry for that matter; I just didn’t feel like living. It was safe to say that I wasn’t getting over my depression so easily. It was more than the arm though. There was something more to my life that was bringing this sadness to the surface, something I’d been avoiding. I didn’t know what the problem was yet.

            With a knock on my door, I opened my eyes to see someone at my door. Ann came into the room. I hadn’t seen her since we returned to the base. She was carry a box filled with stuff. I quickly straighten up when she placed the box next to me on the bed and sat down.

            “I thought you could use some cheering up,” she said with a smile. She dumped out a portion of the box onto the bed. They were children’s toys: paddle balls, slinklies, small cars and trucks, Barbie dolls (wasn’t interested), and little plastic mazes with tiny silver balls in them among other stuff. They were objects I hadn’t seen or touched in years (I guess she stole them off the kids).

            “Do you like paddle ball?” she asked picking it and successfully hit the ball against the paddle 80 times without missing. I tried as well, making it to 20 before the ball smacked me in the face. Ann laughed and I guess I did as well. We went through nearly all the toys, laughing and taunting each other when one of us was better than the other. We were both acting like kids. I’ve never had the luxury or freedom to do so up until this point where I was both safe and didn’t care at all if I died. After we were done, she asked me if I was a good writer. She pulled out a story she’d been writing; 142 pages (I have no idea when she wrote this. Either she wrote it when she got back to base or she’s more private and secretive about her writing than I am). She read me parts of it, stopping to ask about her choice of descriptive adjectives. From what I could tell, the story was about a traveller in a dangerous world where there is an unbalance in everything. Mountains jut out suddenly from flat plains, large trees grow from larger trees like branches, dogs and cats dig their way from underground to the upper world, where they are either worshipped or despised. Both reason and reality were twisted yet it all made sense when seen as a whole. The traveller had a duality about him or her (it doesn’t indicate gender. Only the name traveller); the traveller has the power to bring life or to cause death, but he or she does not see this. The traveller is blind and therefore is unaware of the powers that are being unleashed on the world. We were near the end of the story when we both fell asleep. The traveller had decided to stop his journey for a time and had to decide whether he wanted to keep moving forward or turn around. Ann fell asleep, lying on the bed next to me with her back on my left shoulder. I didn’t care; I couldn’t feel a thing. I thought it was nice of her to try and make me feel better. She’d always been kind and understanding (if not a little stupid sometimes). There weren’t many people in the world like her anymore.

            The next thing I remember, an extremely loud sound of cracking wood came from outside. Both Ann and I jumped up in fright. I looked out the window and saw that part of the front wall had been broken in and soulless were rushing through the opening like bees out of a beehive. The nearby men killed a few, but there were too many and the men were quickly overpowered. These soulless seemed even faster and more vicious than usual. I saw this place as a sanctuary, that’s why I wanted to get back to this base so bad. I should’ve known better than to let my guard down or to place faith in anything, but myself after the first time this happened; when enemies sneak in, walls don’t try and stop them. Walls break or get built to break and age again. I am fool for accepting this peaceful illusion.

            I waste no time when I realized what was happening. I looked away and went to grab my equipment when I realized Ann wasn’t in the room anymore. I thought she might have run to warn anyone still sleeping. I didn’t know if we could save the base, but I had to try. I gathered my equipment and headed outside (one arm was better than nothing). I was instantly greeted by three soulless, which I dodged and shot at point blank range (my aim and coordination was decent compared to how bad it was before). Around me, chaos rushed and moved just as fast as the soulless. A number of survivors were using guns (some of them using heavy machine guns, which were power, but forced them to stay in one place) Those who weren’t lucky enough to have a gun or to be near one rushed to the artillery shed, ran and hid in buildings and behind people or used whatever was nearby to defend themselves. The sound of bullets mixed with the screams and yells of the men and women either screaming in terror or slowly dying. The ground was already littered with bodies, both friend and foe and the air smelled of a thin smoke. I saw men and women get tackled to the ground and reach out their hands in vain as the soulless surrounded them and began frantically feasting on their still-living bodies. I even saw a man running away who had part of his face missing.

            One thing that should be noted about the situation; I didn’t see anyone trying to get away. Although people ran away in terror, they’d often grab a weapon and turn around to face the danger. No one tried to jump the fence or leave. This is how I felt it should have been. Everyone defending their home. At least, that’s how I thought I should have been before. I saw Moses in the distance manning his own gun turret on the back of a armored truck while someone else drove it. They were running over and gunning down enemies in large numbers until three large soulless with blade arms jumped in front of the truck. The truck crashed into them, crushing two out of three. The last one broke through the window shield and pulled the driver out, slicing clean through him at the waist and began eating his entrails. Moses continued to gun afterward even as soulless were mere inches away from his face. For as much effort and bravery as he put up, the gunfire still stopped; I could no longer see or hear him under the pile of soulless.

            I ran around the base looking for Mike and the others. I couldn’t do much in the way of combat right now so trying to help out the others would be near useless. I felt it was my duty to protect Mike and his friends (my friends), even if it meant me losing my life. Getting around turned out to be easier than I expected. For some odd reason, the soulless weren’t interested in me. A few would attack me and I’d take care of them, but many were running passed me, like they didn’t even see me. Even the men and women who were still fighting were too busy to notice me. Every wounded and suffering man and woman noticed me though as they begged for me to save them or to end their suffering. It was ironic; the same guns and the same screams that everyone was using to save the base or themselves was drawing the attention of more and more soulless. It was then that I started to question my resolve about fighting for the base and it was one in the multitude of screams that I heard since I had woken up that I heard Jess’ voice. I frantically looked around, looking at the faces, clean and ugly, and the bodies laying on the ground until I found her; she was trying to crawl out from a pile of soulless that were eating her. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she clawed at the Earth, yelling out to me in desperation, “Please help me!” I saw old memories, memories of Jane as they dragged her back into the gathering of soulless, but now Jess firmly took Jane’s place as her face of terror overpowered the old memory, bringing tears to my eyes as well. All I could do was look away; had I stared any longer, I don’t think I could’ve moved on.

            Not long after, I saw two men on top of a building; it was Victor and Brian. They both had grenade launchers and were using them wisely, taking out large gatherings of soulless. I began to make my way over to them when the door to the roof broke open and soulless ran at them. The soulless came at the men in such a rush, they ended up pushing themselves along with Victor and Brian off the roof before Victor and Brian had a chance to react. The impact of the fall killed them. I still wanted to check on them; at the time, I thought they could’ve survived the fall. I made my way over and knelt down to check on Victor to find his skull broken open, grey matter and blood leaking out onto the bone fragments. I proceeded to check Brian when some soulless were running toward me, probably to feast on their bodies. I raised my gun to shoot them, but my left arm began intensely hurting again, making the ability to aim a gun nearly impossible. The gun fell out of my hand with the soulless only a few yards away. I did the only thing I could think to do with the now limited mobility I had because of the pain; I’d seen them pounce at their victims when they ran as soon as they were within jumping range so as soon as their feet left the ground, I dove and rolled under them. They missed and quickly turned back (I guess, at the time, I really didn’t think about what to do next). It was then that they were gunned down from behind in a mere matter of seconds. Walking overtop the bodies came Mike and Julie.

            “Come on! We have to go!” he yelled. Julie helped me up and Mike led the way with his large machine gun to what I could only assume was a way out. We were getting closer and closer to the base wall and more and more soulless just kept coming. Mike gunned all of them down, sometimes having to kick a few away while reloading. The sound of gunfire decreased with every passing moment. Man after man fell to the surge of soulless and the number of soulless just kept increasing.

The base was doomed. It was now about surviving.

            We reached the wall and Mike told Julie to stand on his hands so he could boost her up over the wall. She did so when suddenly, a sword burst through the wall where Julie was, ripping through her chest and protruding out her back before she could make it over. Mike reeled backwards in shock staring at Julie’s body hanging on the large grotesque sword, dropping the machine gun. She gasped for breath violently while the rest of her body was completely motionless (probably due to shock). The sword retracted and Julie’s body fell to the ground. Mike ran over to her. I knew we were going to get attacked by more soulless so I picked up the machine gun, positioned it between my right leg and one good arm, and started shooting at the soulless approaching us. I didn’t look back to see what was happening, but I heard coughing as well as a faint whispering of some kind, like “this can’t be real. This can’t be real…”

            “Mike! Get up now! Come on!”

            Within a few moments, he came back to my side and drew the rifle on his back, and began shooting as well. We were keeping them at bay at the moment though I knew we’d run out of ammo soon. The soulless numbers never decreased; they just kept growing, growing to the point where the place looked like an audience for a death metal band. It wouldn’t be long before the base was completely packed with soulless. Suddenly, I heard the now familiar sound of cracking again. I looked back to see the base wall falling forward. I jumped out of the way, dodging it, but Mike didn’t. The wall was at least a half-foot thick so it was extremely heavy.  The soulless that had killed Julie had broken the wall down as well. In an instant, I fired on the soulless and it fell over, but the situation was the same. Mike was stuck under the wall, extremely injured. I can’t stop to try and lift the wall up or else the soulless would kill me. I continued to shoot the oncoming soulless until I realized that the soulless were now coming through the new opening. One nearly got me.

            Mike struggled the whole time to get out. He was coughing up blood. It even looked like he tried to get ahold of his rifle to help out, but it was jammed underneath him. “Help… me…” he said faintly just as the clip in the machine gun was going to run out. Even among the snarls, stomping, and gunfire, I heard the words so clearly and I still do. I wanted to save him. I at least wanted to put him out of his misery, but the machinegun ran out of bullets. I ran away, following the base wall, hoping to find a door or maybe an escape hatch. I never looked back. My athletic skills were good, but I was barely staying ahead of the soulless. That’s when I saw Ann. Far off, I could see her standing by the base wall, looking at me curiously. She jumped up and climbed over the wall. I didn’t know where she thought she was going. I thought the outside was probably crawling with soulless as well. Still, she was the last one of my friends left so I followed, barely being able to grab the top of the fence and pull myself over (with one arm).

            The impact of the fall over the fence was nothing compared to the guilt I felt. I could’ve saved them had I been better. I could’ve saved Mike if I’d stay. I’m a hypocrite and coward. I expected a group of soulless to approach me at any moment. After a minute of nothing happening, I realized there was silence. No gunshots, no chewing sounds, nothing at all; not even a faint chirping of birds or a light breeze. Everything was silent. I looked up, expected a much different picture than what I was greeted with; in the forest around me hung bodies. Tree branches pierced through some bodies while others hung by rope like piñatas. The bodies were rotten and decomposing. It was one of the weirdest sights I’d ever seen. There was no movement at all. No soulless coming to attack me and no survivors or Ann. I couldn’t even tell if the bodies were soulless or human at one point in their lives; they were all grey, green, brown, and white. What shocked me even more was the vast number of them. Every tree I could see for yards and yards had bodies hanging from them. It was a disturbing sight that would definitely work well for Halloween. Strangely, although I couldn’t tell who they were, they seemed familiar. I wandered around when I suddenly saw Ann run passed a tree. I called to her, but there was no response. I ran after her, but found myself unable to catch her. This went on for a few minutes before my pursuit took me out of the forest, down a large hill and into a city. The city was empty as well. At least there weren’t any bodies hanging around. Suddenly, I heard Ann’s voice. It was much louder and firm then I recalled.

            “What are you thinking now?” asked Ann?

            “Where are you?”

            “What are you thinking now?” she asked again.

            “I’m thinking why are you hiding?”

            “Not a bad question, but how about this one: does any of this seem familiar to you?”

            “What do mean? Ann, stop this! Stop hiding!”

            “Really? Nothing? It reminds me of what happened to your old base.”

            “My old base?”

            “Yah, the Hill; the one that was overrun by soulless. I’d say today was just like it, if not a little more ironic.”

            There’s no way Ann could’ve known that. The only person I mentioned the name of my previous base to was Lexi and she died before Ann met her.

            “How… did you know about that?”

            “You are quite a writer at times, Jack. The way you describe your surroundings and express the truth of human nature makes me envious of your writing skills.”

            “You’ve been reading my journal?! Why?”

            “Curiosity. It’s funny. Your life is full of irony really. Anyone you try and protect always ends up dying and when the time comes for you to die for your base, you run with your tail between your legs.”

            “There was nothing I could do. Besides, I was following you.”

            “That’s right. Another irony. To think, the one and only person you personally let into the group was me. You’re usually such a good judge of character. I suppose we all make mistakes.”

            “And what’s so bad about you?”

            Ann laughed playfully.

            “Oh, Jack. You’re so stupid. Do you think all those soulless gathered at the base on their own? I brought them. And your arm, well, that was one of the most delightful of my projects.”

            She sounded devious and insane. If what she’s saying is true, then my suspicions were right before.

            “What did you do to my arm?”

            “Oh, I can’t reveal all my secrets. Instead, let me fix it.”

            Suddenly, an arm wrapped around my waist and another one grabbed below my armpit near where the cut was. There was no time to struggle; I felt a small intense pinch in my arm and within a second, I felt myself being kicked to the ground. Instinctually, I went to grab a knife when I realized I grabbed it with my left arm. It was perfectly fine. I looked back and Ann stood indifferent to me, as if this was an everyday event.

            She wasted no time, “I’ve been watching you for a long time. Long before you met Mike and his stupid friends. I’ve seen you go from a man who killed when it was only necessary to where death is your go to answer. You remind me so much of myself and yet you still cling to an abstract moral code that even you question. You’re capable of so much more than merely surviving and looking after the human mongrels you care so much about.”

            “I don’t have much of a choice now. You killed them all and now I’m going to kill you!”

            “Aren’t you being a little hypocritical? You’ve killed hundreds of people, all of who had families and friends. Just like the ones you protect. Why are they important? What makes them better than those you killed?”

            I came at her with the knife, but she sidestepped me and grabbed my arm. She didn’t even have to bend it; all she did was squeeze extremely hard and I am sure I felt something break (the crack was as loud as the broken walls). I screamed in pain.

            “It was fun to meet you close up. You learn so much about someone through first hand interaction. I could kill you, but like any child with a magnifying glass, I love to watch the weak suffer. The fear on your face when you realized your arm was useless was exciting. There’s a powerful feeling in making others feel powerless. It was almost as exciting as watching your battles. So much blood!” she said with excitement, “But I think I should be going. A show is only good when you get to sit and relax during its performance; being a part of it isn’t as much fun.”

            I quickly threw a knife, only to have her catch it. I stood up, drawing another knife and approached her. I prepared to stab her when she used the knife I threw before to slice open my chest and gab her hand inside. It was such a strange, fearful, and shocking experience that I couldn’t move. She pushed her hand under my rib cage and grabbed my heart and started squeezing it. The fear was 10 times worse than the pain.

            “What… what the hell are you?!” I asked, almost pleading.

            Her skin began to change to a pale color as it developed wrinkles and scars. Her eyes became darker and the air around her changed to a dark mist. Everything else began to look red.

 “I am no one. To you, I’m Ann, but you can call me…,” her voice changed to a sinister, loud tone, “the Devil!”

            Suddenly, I woke up. It was still nighttime. I was back in my room laying onto of my bed and everything was quiet. It was all a dream… or so I thought. Ann wasn’t in bed with me so I figured she went back to her room. When I pulled up the covers, I found blood on the mattress cover. It wasn’t mine. Upon further inspection, the blood reached down the bed for five feet (which was about how tall Ann was). The place where the blood had soaked in was exactly where Ann had been laying (it even had a slight outline of her body). I thought she could’ve been hiding in the room so I looked around. That’s when I noticed the red handprints and footprints on the walls and ceiling, as if some had been crawling across them. They led to the window, which was open. There was no one outside and the base was still intact. Another thing I didn’t notice; I could move my left arm again. It was completely fine.

            At this point, I thought that this might all be a joke or something. My mind couldn’t accept what was going on. It was a dream involving Ann being a traitor (and maybe something even worse). I wake up to find blood places where it shouldn’t be. I thought that Ann may have had her period or something, but it didn’t explain the prints. I even found one on my face when I looked in the mirror (it was as if it was cradling my cheek). You may wonder how I was able to remember that dream so well. Truth is I didn’t have to. Next to my bed on the nightstand was a collection of papers that described every detail. What was stranger, it was written in blood and in my handwriting. My last question was partially answered; my right index fingernail had been cut out in the shape of a fountain pen, meaning that I could’ve written; yet I don’t remember doing so. At this last realization, I rushed to Ann room to find it empty. I searched all around the base and she wasn’t there. Was it a dream or a message? Was it a prediction? It was a frightening thought that I didn’t want think. Not only this, Mike wasn’t here and neither was Julie. Please do not let this be real. I closed the window and I haven’t been to sleep since (not easy to sleep when you think someone’s watching you). I’m waiting until morning and if they don’t return, I’m going to look for them. One thing is for certain. I’m not telling anyone about this. They’ll think I’m crazy! And they might be right!

- Jack's Diary

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Jack's Diary - The Pain - Day 61

            Something has changed. I can’t feel my left arm anymore. I noticed it when Brian came into my tent to wake me up and I instinctually tried to swing my left fist at him. When nothing happened, I got angry and took it out on him. Everyone was so happy that morning. Mike was sitting down and relaxing and the mood was generally calm. I can’t remember when I last felt this way or was happy at all. When I was on my own, I loved the mornings and I loved the wilderness. Now, I feel numb, both in my left arm and to the feelings I once had. What in the world happened to me? What am I?

            Mike split us up into four groups. I got Brian and Jess on my team along with 5 kids. According to Brian, Mike planned to make a nonstop trip back to base. I was only the good news that I heard that day. I wanted to get back to base and reflect. I am lost right now, with no one looking for me.

            We went into what appeared to be a large old motel searching for medicine. Each room had a cabinet that contained a few useful things like sleeping pills and antidepressants. There’s no way a motel would offer these drugs to customers for free. People must have brought them along on their trip and forgot to or neglected to take them. They are ours now. Brian and everyone else avoided being around me, even Jess. Not sure what their problem is. I didn’t really have much time to ponder this because a large group of soulless from the upper floors and from outside rushed in without reason. It was like a call went out and everyone, but us received it. I came out into the hall to find group members gathered in the center of hall, some running in our direction from soulless. A group of soulless rushed down the hall, so I took out my handgun with my good arm and started firing. I missed. The first time I’ve ever missed with a handgun in years. The group covered the entire span of the hall and I struggled just to shoot them, let alone shoot them in the head to end them. The others fired as well, hitting and killing the soulless with ease. There were too many of them and the group turned tail and ran away without me even realizing (some friends, huh?). If I couldn’t shoot them, I decided I’d stab them. I pulled out my machete and cut through three when suddenly, a terrible pain struck my left arm. It was unlike any pain I’d ever felt in my life, so much so that I dropped my machete and nearly fell over. I managed to stumble back into the room I came out of before and closed the door, locking it behind me. A great number of the soulless were trying to break down the door as I leaned against it, hoping that the pain would subside. I had no idea how the others were fairing. Then again, leaving me like that was just as bad as stabbing me so I didn’t worry too much. The wood the padlock on the door was screwed into was splitting from all of the brute force on the door. Less and less noise could be heard outside the door, but the door continued to weaken. I had one of the flares with me. As much as I hated to do it, I launched it out the window (that was thankfully already broken open). Not long after, the door was just about to come off its hinges so I backed away from the door and drew my knives. They charged in without hesitation. I kicked one back and stabbed another coming at me from the side in the chest. I tried to throw knives, only to miss using them as well. It was too risky to shove my way passed them so only thing I could do was take out my crowbar and hit them. I killed a few, but this came to a sudden halt when the pain returned. I struggled just to keep a hold of the crowbar. When I realized I couldn’t swing the crowbar, I backed myself into a corner and called out for help, something I rarely do and am ashamed of doing it. By luck, Mike was nearby and took care of the remaining soulless in the room. There was no time to explain as Mike took me up to the roof. Apparently, he saw the rest of the group fending off soulless on the roof. By the time we got up there, all the soulless were dead. The struggle was over for now.

            That was the last emergency of the day. Everyone else handled themselves against danger and the groups came back with supplies. I didn’t celebrate. I gathered the weapons I dropped and head over to a tree to practice. The left arm didn’t hurt anymore though it was strange that it is numb to the touch yet I could feel such intense pain from it. The sun began going down and I continued to practice throwing my knives. My aim was decent, but not as good as it once was. Again I asked, what happened to me? You don’t just lose skill overnight. Mike came over some time to talk with me.

            “So, what happened back at the building?” he asked.

            I had my back to him, still facing the tree. I didn’t want to turn around.

            “I can’t feel my left arm anymore.”

            Mike was silent for a few moments. He walked around and faced me.

            “You mean you can’t move it at all?”

            No and it gets worse. I kept feeling an incredible amount of pain that left me debilitated and defenseless.”

            “Let me see.” Mike took a look at my arm, examining the stitches. It looked okay to me.

            “It looks like it’s healing. No infection or discoloring. Though I’m not a doctor.” He looked up at me, “Maybe it’s all in your head.”

            I nearly snapped when he said that. I jerked away and walked to the tree to retrieve my knives.

            “Come on, Jack. It happens to the best of us.”

            “This isn’t in my head! The pain was so bad, I considered killing myself! And it’s not just that. For the first time in years, I couldn’t aim a gun at all. They were 10 feet away and I struggled just to clip them.” I pulled two of the knives out of the tree while Mike just stood there, unable to think of anything to say I suppose. It was then that the pain returned. I tried to scream, but the pain was too much. All I could do was gag and struggle to breathe as I squirmed on the ground like worm in the sun.

            “Jack? Jack, what the hell!” Mike ran to me and propped me up against the tree, “Jack. Calm down. Take some deep breaths.”

            I wanted to tell him to stop talking to me like I was a child, but I couldn’t speak. I pushed Mike to the side and tried walking back to camp. I fell, only making it two steps.

            “I just want to get back to base. Let’s go back to base now, Mike! Right now!”

 I said desperately.

            “You’re in no condition to travel. You need to rest.”

            “Rest is pointless! I’ll just die a little tomorrow! We go back to base or I’ll drag myself there!”

            Dragging myself wasn’t working. I was making no progress. Mike called one of the kids over and the two of them took me back to my tent. I started seeing distortions and illusions. Mike and the kid were dressed in light bronze armor, escorting me over a sea of spikes. The shadows gathered around the great light watched with curiosity. In the distance, I saw a few men and woman walking around, looking for a grocery store. The guards dropped me down the pit of fire. While the fire tormented me and obstructed my view, the devil walked in, out of the chasm. He stood over me, smiling in amusement, speaking words I couldn’t hear over the shouts of the flames. He sat beside me, often touching my forehead with his burning hand. He just sat there smiling.

            I can’t remember what happened after that last distorted memory. By that time, I had probably passed out. I woke up to find Ann sitting beside. She’d been there ever since they had first laid me down. I didn’t feel comfortable having people around me right now so I asked her to leave, which she complied with protest. I didn’t have anymore intense pains. It wouldn’t have mattered anyway. My gun is gone. Mike or someone probably took it. My other weapons except for the knives are too far away for me to reach. Maybe later.

- Jack's Diary

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Jack's Diary - Bloody War - Day 59

            I look back on history and wonder what a nation’s reaction was when they realized they started a war. In war, there are no winners and losers when it comes to sides; the winners are those who go home alive and the losers are the ones who die as a result of the war, a war begun with a conflict that didn’t start with them and a cause that was either noble enough to die for or urgent enough for the leaders to force them to die for it. I can go on and on about war and I haven’t been the first to say this. War is fruitless when we can compromise and debate the problem before us. Of course, when it’s a war between hundreds of armed men vs. six, one injured, one could say it’s not war, just a few lose ends to tie up… the exception is us.

            Right now, I’m driving down a dirt road, having just turned off the highway. Today, we brought Julie to the Valor’s base. It was just as intimidating up close as it was from a distance. The area around the base wall had a smaller wall of sandbags, the front of the bags being covered in barbed wire. There were machine guns mounted on the rooftop edges and (perhaps I’m imaging things) what appeared to be a rail gun or turret. There was also a tall fenced in area where many of the vehicles were stored. They were seriously armed and well defended though it did not look like a place for kids.

            At the gate, Mike announced that we had the package. Three guys let us in and were going to escort Julie inside when Mike asked to see some of the other kids as proof that their intentions were good (smart). They brought them out and not a single kid looked happy. I wanted to take them aside and ask them some questions, but the men seemed adamant that they get back inside the base as soon as Mike saw them. With as much as was wrong with this situation, reacting right now wouldn’t have been smart. We could sneak into the base later and find out what was really going on, but this wasn’t really necessary. As we were walking away, one of the guys whispered something under his breath that alluded to pedophilia. Before anyone else could say anything, Mike took out his Uzi and killed the three men (not smart). In that moment, Mike had started war and there was no time to apologize or debate over the issue. Mike told me to get a nearby black van hotwired (for someone who hasn’t hotwired that often, I think I did it in record time). We almost made it out of range from the base when they opened fire and hit Mike. I drove for nearly 10 minutes and no one seemed to follow us or at least they hadn’t caught up. Their vehicle set up within the fence wouldn’t allow them to just drive off on an impulse. Mike was bleeding profusely and was barely still awake. He wanted me to go to the last base we were at, which was suicide. I’m sure they knew very well what they were going to do with Julie. Besides, they wouldn’t hesitate to hand us over to save themselves. Also, I have no idea where to go. We didn’t travel by highway the last half of the trip and Mike was not in his right mind to be giving specific directions or orders for that matter. I turned down a dirt road leading off the highway. It was a one-way road surrounded by trees that led to an old house. I parked the van behind it, hitting a stray soulless in the process. I proceeded to get out and punch the back of the van over and over again. In this situation, I think I was entitled to a short temper tantrum: We’re in a war with an army of men and Mike’s seriously injured with no one around that can save him, but the same people who shot him. They no doubt have medical supplies and people who know how to use them inside that fortress. Jess opened up the van door and stepped.

            “Jack, stop it!” she said grabbing my arm before I could punch the van again. It had numerous dents, splashed with blood from my bloody knuckles. I pulled my arm away and started walking around the van.

            “This is the one of the worst outcomes that could’ve happened. I knew from the start that something was wrong with this job and that’s why I came along in the first place!”

            “We can’t be wasting time. We need to get Mike some help.”

            “Help? Where exactly are we going to find help?”

            “Mike said to go to the other base.”

            “I don’t know where that base. We didn’t take a direct route here, remember? And do you really think they’d help us. That they would even try if they found what Mike did?  We’d be better off throwing him to a pack of rabid wolves,” I said loudly. I was beginning to sound hysterical.

            “So what? Are you just going to give up?”

            “No! I just need some time to think!”

            Jess shut up for a minute or two until everyone else came out of the van.

            Victor spoke up next, “I know we’re not surgeons, but we could probably remove the bullet ourselves.”

            “That’s risky. He was shot in the abdomen. Some of his organs may have been ripped and punctured. Sewing up a wound on a limb is easy. Organs, however, require much more care, or else they’ll get infected and Mike would die.”

            Only one plan came to mind. It was completely nuts and risky, but at this point, we didn’t have much of a choice: we could either let Mike die and go home or try it.

            “I may have a plan. If it works, we may be able to save Mike and get some revenge, but I need to know whether or not you’re willing to put your life on the line.”

            Everyone agreed except for Brian.

            “Too bad Brian. You’re coming with us and if you even try and escape, I’ll kill you myself. If you do help us though, we’ll allow you to leave. Got it?”

            Brian grudgingly agreed. I took about 10 minutes to explain the plan before we drove off back toward the Valor’s base. I wrote a little message for Mike and gave it to Victor, telling him to make sure that when they drop him off that he has it with him. Jess was driving while Victor, Brian, and I had the windows rolled down ready to shoot. I expected that they’d try and come after us. What I didn’t expect was to find them behind us (They must have circled around after they passed the dirt road). There were three vehicles after us: a jeep, an SUV covered in armor and spikes, and a red mustang (nice car). The first gunshots took us by surprise. They pierced the back of the van, a bullet striking Ann in the leg. I had never shot from a moving vehicle so it took about three shots to hit the driver in the jeep. It went off the road, as did the SUV when Victor and Brian shot out the wheels. While we focused on the other vehicles, the mustang drove up beside our backend and the driver started slamming his car into the side of the van to make us crash. Just then, Jess swerved hard to the left to avoid to vehicles heading toward us in the opposite direction. The red mustang was run off the side of the road down a hillside trying to avoid collision. The last two wasted no time in turning around and pursuing us (late arrivals). Both vehicles were small armored cars and they were fast. There was at least a 100-yard gap between us when they had completely stopped and yet, they caught up in less than 10 seconds. We shot out the front tires, but it didn’t stop them. One car went on each side of us and rammed us back and forth like we were the ball in Pong. They were playing with us. I almost fell out when they did this. We fired at the glass with no success. These cars were bullet proof and powerful. Finally, I told Jess to slam on the breaks and hang on. When the van stopped I took out the Uzi Mike had used previously and tried to shoot out the back tires, though only hitting one on each car. The cars turned around and came back at us with near perfection in driving skills. Jess turned around and we ended in in the same situation as we were before; the cars using us for a game volleyball, only this time, they began shooting at us. I told the guys to use more powerful guns. Victor picked up a rifle while I decided to use a shotgun and surprisingly, it pierced the window shield and killed the driver, making the car slowed decelerate until starting scraping against the guard rail. Victor had similar success so we were safe for now. I told Jess to turn around so I could get the drive the other car. I thought it would come in handy and it did.

            I’ll reveal each part of the plan as I’m writing. Once we reached the base, we did some surveillance and, of course, there were guards outside this time. Just as I thought there would be. I drove the armored car up to the base and the guards, recognizing it as one of their vehicles, let me without even questioning me. (This was a lot better than my original plan, believe me). I unlocked the fence that led to the parking lot with the keys I acquired from the dead driver. There were men waiting for me at the entrance. I took Mike out of the back of the car and rushed over to the entrance (I covered his face dirt and blood so they might not recognize him).

            I handed them Mike, “Can you take him to get fixed up? He’s barely alive.”

            The guy checked his pulse and looked at his wounds. “Man, you’re not kidding! What the hell happened to him?”

            “We went after the guys who killed the three near the gate. They shot him and he went off the road and crushed.”

            The guy handed Mike off to a nearby one and told him to go.

            “Where are the others?”

            “They’re dead. They were a lot more skilled than we thought.”

            “You got to be kidding?! All of them?!”

            “You can take a look for yourself. I wasn’t originally driving in that car. The shot through the window and killed him. It was the only one still intact or not over a hill.”

            “Did you at least kill the guys you were after?”

            “I didn’t personally, but the guy driving the car identical to this one drove them and himself over the hill. I checked on both the van and car. They were all dead.”

            “At least they’re dead. It’s a shame really. The boss isn’t going to like this.”

            “Not too much we can do. If you don’t mind, I’m going to go comb the blood out of my hair.”

            The guy laughed and let me by.

            For as well stocked and clean as this place was, it was boring and depressing on the inside. The attack wasn’t going to happen until I gave the signal and we needed to wait about two or three hours until Mike was taken care of. In the meantime, I took a tour and found where they were keeping the kids. They kept them; both boys and girls, in a giant room with bunk beds and every so often, a guy would come, pick a kid, and take him into a room. I don’t know what happens in there, but whenever they came back out, the kid’s clothes were more wrinkled, the kid had a distant look on his or her face, and the guy would walk away as if nothing happened.

            After about an hour of walking around, I knew where everything was in the building (food, guns, ammo, explosives, some of which I pocketed), including Mike who, according to an assistant working with the surgeons, was pretty sure he going to pull through. It would be another two hours before the surgery was finished. I couldn’t just hang around in the base for another three hours; it would look suspicious and it would get boring so I decided to take action. Going up to one of the top floors, I entered each room and systematically, but quietly, kill everyone. I asked to come to talk or to pretend like I had something important to say then I’d slice their throats and shove them out of sight: closets, under beds, bathtubs, and in the draw of a clothes closet (tight fit). I must of killed 40 people before my cover was almost blown. One guy yelled which brought another guy in and a guy that saw that guy enter the room was followed by another; it was like a badly written sitcom playing out. In the end, I managed to kill 124 people (that’s right, I counted) before someone took notice. During that time, I actually began to detest killing. In the past, I took some happiness from each person I killed, as if I was better than them. Their lives didn’t matter to me; my friend’s lives barely matter to me. Usually, shoot someone, I don't check to make sure their dead unless I suspect they aren't. Stabbing is a different story. After every time I slashed or stabbed a person in the throat, I stood over them, looking into their eyes to make sure they died. Image doing that a hundred times. Image seeing the horror on their faces as they realized they were dying, as they reached up to me in desparation for help and I did nothing. Of the 124, most of them were men. The men sometimes had "friends" over. In each and every single room, mementoes and pictures were displayed on shelves and walls, depicting a happier time. Things have changed since then. Everyone has changed and now I keep wondering if there may have been good in the people I killed that day. 

            By the time the base became aware of the dead bodies, an hour and a half had already passed so I headed up toward the roof. On the floor two levels down from the roof, I saw a familiar sight; a fire alarm. I must a passed these multiple times during all that killing. My original plan was to head up to the roof and signal everyone to make loud noises to draw anyone out of the building so I could use the machine gun turret on the roof to kill them, but the plans changed and they might change again. If the fire alarm worked, I could've pulled it and nearly everyone still alive would exit the building. Of course, there was no electricity anymore. That's when inspiration struck me in the form of arson. I went through the rooms and found plenty of alcohol. I poured it all over one of the beds and set it on fire. I then waited a few seconds before going down to warn everyone. The plan worked. Not only that, but all the suspicion about the dead bodies (even as they found more of them) was put to the side as people knocked on doors trying to evacuate everyone. Two men went up to the room with fire extinguisher to try and put it out. I intervened (connect the dots).

            By the time I reached the roof, mostly everyone was out. People were running back in and coming out with supplies and piling them up. I didn't see mike or the kids. It was time for the signal. I threw one of my grenades into the air and shot it, exploding it in mid-air. The van was lined up with the base entrance down the hill from it. When she heard the signal, Julie wedged a thick piece of wood between the seat and accelerator. She stayed in to make sure it stayed on course before jumping and rolling out. The van ran over a few of the Valors, ricocheted off the right side of gate, and crashed through the entrance, blocking it off. Now, the only way in or out is through the side door of the building. Also, the signal wasn't just for Julie. As soon as they heard the explosion, Brian, Jess and Ann exited the trunk of the car I drove in (it was a tight squeeze). Brian and Jess shot whoever tried to get out through the side. As soon as gunfire filled my ears, I jumped on the turret, and started firing at on the ground. There must had been hundreds and hundreds of people down below. A great deal of them fired and I just narrowly dodged certain death. Everyone was either running away, heading toward the vehicles (which Jess and Brian made sure no one would touch), or shooting back at me. I ducked behind the turrets and fired mostly by instinct and luck (I didn't do too bad of a job). Anyone who ran south from the base had the misfortune of meeting Victor and Julie. They were both instructed to shoot and/or throw grenades at whoever or whatever moved. The turret ran out of ammo so I shot the few remaining determined men. The situation was getting hot (literally with the fire one floor below) so I tied the rope I brought with me off to the turret and slowly propelled my way down the right side of the building passed the burning floors. It seems I didn't get all the men because I was fired at, hit in the leg and nearly fell to my death. I held on and I ended up swinging myself to the front of the building, where the rope shifted, suddenly making me fall 5 feet before I crashed through a window on the fourth floor. My left arm had an extremely deep cut (it was so deep that I could I could see my bone through the thin membrane of muscle still covering it. It was the worst pain I had ever experienced. Still, I pushed onward. I made in to the surgery room only to find it devoid of anyone, including Mike. The surgeons could have taken Mike with them or maybe he woke up and read the notes. Either way, my mission was done. There was nothing more I could do in my condition. I went to where the children were being held to make sure they didn't burn alive and guess who I found already there; Mike. He had already gotten them all out and backed as well. He took one look at me and said, "you look like shit!"

            "You don't look so good yourself!" I added. 

            I showed Mike and the kids the way out. Mike stilled wasn't completely healed and things were getting pretty blurring with all the loss of blood so I was glad when we didn't run into anyone. 

            We made it outside and met Brian, Jess, and Ann. The ground was covered in bleeding bodies and I could still hear gunshots going off in the distance.

            "Thanks Brian. You're free to go if you want, but before you do, could you help out Victor? It sounds like he still has a few loose ends to tie."

            "Sure," he said, macho-ly walking off. Sure seems like he had fun. Some of the older kids took guns off the dead bodies and follow Brian (I was in no condition to stop them). 

            "Hey, what are you doing?" Mike asked.

            They said they were going to help. mike didn't like the idea. 

            "Mike, just let them. I'm sure they can't do any harm to us or themselves."

            So the older ones followed Brian while the younger ones just kicked and peed on the corpses (I'm sure they had it coming). When Ann saw my arm, she was shocked.

            "Ohhhh! Here, let me help you," she said pulling me down to the ground and holding out a first aid kit. 

            "Wait. What're you doing?"

            "I'm going to fix your arm."

            "You don't know anything about first aid."

            "Yes I do. How do you think I took care of my wound?"

            Her leg was covered with a bandage and she seemed to walk just fine on it.

            "Fine." I was too tired to argue.

            Mike told Jess to help him get some more stuff out of the base before it burned down, mainly gasoline. After about a half hour long gunfight, Brian, Victor, Julie, and the kids came back, apparently victorious. Victor was limping back (I guess things didn't go as smoothly as I hoped). For the most part, we were successful. Mike is better and we saved the kids.

            From here on out, Mike took charge. All of the remaining vehicles were packed with the all the supplies and people it could carry. Brian and Jess patrolled the area to make sure there were soulless and that no one was ready to ambush us. There were a few gun shots.

            Ann finished up with my arm. It felt so weird afterward. It wasn't long before we were leaving the toppled kingdom. The older kids (who I'm not sure had ever drove a car before) were driving with Mike in the lead car giving directions. I don't know what car I'm in. All I've been doing is writing and looking at this paper since I got in. I just wonder if it was really worth killing all those people to save just one life? We freed the kids, I know, but there must have been another way. A more peaceful way. We are victorious, but in the end, we are still human. We are losers. I'm done writing and I want to go to sleep. It feels like someone's touch my left arm, but there's no one near me except Ann...

- Jack's Diary

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