Mike's Diary - Day 54 "Funny Threat. How scary."

     I woke up the next day feeling exhausted and dehydrated. I needed a drink. Everyone was still sleeping, except Rider, she was a usual playing with Sam. I approached her and said
     "You failed the first test." Should I trust you?
     "What are you talking abut?"
     "Sneaking up through my diary." I responded, and she stayed quite. I proceeded, my way into a tent and looked for alcohol, a knife, heated the knife up, ripped my sleeve, poured some alcohol on my wound, and sunk the knife into my shoulder trying to get the bullet out.
     "Need help on that?" she said
     "What? You think I should trust you? No I've done this may times."
     "I could've killed you with my knife if I wanted to." She threw her knife  sunk into the tree beside me. I picked it and threw it back to her, I chuckled, and got the bullet out.
     "You got some problems lady." I said to her
     "Yeah? You're the one who almost killed us all!"
     "whatsup?" Jack asked
     "Just a little chat." I said
     "You know, you're stupid." She said to me, "Even Jack agrees." I saw Pack's jaw dropped, and I smiled and woke everybody up.
     "That's true, I'm stupid." I told her, then looked at Jack. I smiled again, to myself this time. I mean I've been having a tough week, give me a break for fuck sake.
     "let's go guys, we're going." I said while packing everything up. After we packed up, I led the way through forest, it was dead, quite, but breezy. I just simply love this mood. Julie caught up to me and said "I heard it all. I believe you Mike." I looked down to her then continue walking. Jack approached Julie and said
      "Hey do me a favour, give Mike a little space okay?"
We continued to walk, Victor was talking to Jess, Julie was talking to Ann, and Jack was arguing with Rider. I stopped walking and everyone stopped talking all at once.
      "Why the hell are we stopping?" Rider said
      "You'd be dead if you were alone." I responded. No seriously, I could hear a horde coming our way, I'm pretty sure no one notice this because they were too busy talking. I told everybody to stay where they are and proceeded my way hoping I could find a good way around. Too many people walking at the same time will just alert those craze. No way around. Great. There's a lake though, we might be able to cross it. I found a canoe that fits 3 people, so we had to make 3 trips across. Rider, Julie, and Victor, then Jack, Jess, and Victor, then of course, it's a bad luck when it came down to me. The horde was alerted because of, I dot even know what. Ughhhh..I was really frustrated at that point.
        "MIKE!" Julie yelled. I looked at her, at Victor in the water, and Jack who was too already across the lake.
        "YOU GUYS GO. Jack you're in charge." I said, I ran off to lure those craze away, but I managed to give Rider the death stare, and yelled "HAPPY NOW RIDER?!" While I disappeared into the forest. Okay now it's just me. I ran until I got far enough and found  big tree. A rope? Great! I climbed onto the tree and tied myself to it on the waist so I don't fall while I sleep. Weird enough, there's no breeze, no wind whatsoever. I'm here a lonely wanderer with his diary observing deep into the paleness of the night sky decorated with  a moon and nothing else. Once again, Lexi, no. Julie, pops up into my head, and I try not to let that attached itself to my innerself.

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Jack's Diary - The Stare Exchange - Day 53

     Sick again. A few minutes after Mike gets up, he's down again. At this rate, it might take us months to reach the Valors base. I suppose that could be both a good and bad thing. At this point, I just want to go back to our base. Perhaps I should talk about happier things or at least more interesting things. We have a new member.
     When I came back, I alerted Mike to the men I'd heard (I was surprised to see him up). I also noticed the new member. Her name is Evie. She carries a puppy with her as strange as it may sound (in times like these, another unnecessary responsible seems risky, especially one that needs food and water). Anyways, Mike directed us to approach the men. We were cautious about doing so and I really couldn't tell if they were shifty or not. When they inquired about the girls, it should have been a dead give away. We gave them some of our food and they replay us by shooting at us. We were already at an exit to the sewers leading to a gathering of trees. The others ducked for cover while Mike and I disposed of the men. Evie seemed shocked and frightened at how we handled the situation. It was almost as if she'd never seen someone killed before. I told her that this is the way we handle things when our friends are threatened (or something like that). She was hesitant to come along with us, but she chose to. Not long after, Mike collapsed and we set up camp again outdoors. I decided to survey the surrounding area; there were no other survivors near by. There were a grouping of soulless in the distance, but they were far enough away not to give us trouble. I found a good piece of oak and began carving it with a knife to make a walking stick (Mike's going to need all the help he can get).
     A few hours passed. Victor had started to prepare dinner while Julie and Ann went to gather fire wood. Then I saw Evie far off from our camp, sitting on the grass. I couldn't tell what she was doing. I waited about 10 minutes before approaching her, with questions running through my head like "Who is she?", "Why should we trust her?", "Why does she seem different?". Well, curiosity got the better of me. She saw me in the distance walking toward her, all the time her eyes were fixed on me, weary of my intentions. I could seed she'd been playing with her puppy, who now looked up at her inquisitively. It looked like she had something behind her back (probably a weapon). I didn't want to get too close.
     "I don't think we formally met. My name is Jack."
     She had this distrusting look on her face, the same one I probably had upon mine.
     "My name is Evie."
     We stared at each other for a moment longer before I sat down on the grass facing her. I didn't have my hand on a weapon, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't ready to draw my gun if she made a move. We stared at each other intently. Neither one of us spoke. It may have been one of the most awkward moments of my life. I was never a man for patience so I came right out and said it.
     "Are you staying with us or what?"
     "I'm not sure," was her response.
     "I suggest you make up your mind soon. You're either with us or against us."
     She didn't like what I said.
     "It wasn't a threat. I just don't want someone who might betray us loitering about."
     "You don't have to worry about that," she said.
     "So you say. If I took promises at face value, I would've been killed long ago."
     It seems she trusted me enough to take her death stare off me and look at her dog. She held him close.
     "What do you want?" Evie asked.
     I paused a moment to gather my thoughts. "I came over here to inquire about you. Perhaps that's not as important as I once thought if you're not staying with us. Then again, why should I expect you to join us? You don't know a thing about us."
      It appeared that I struck a chord with her because there was something in that look of hers (which is strange because reading facial expressions are not one of my skills).
     "If you want to know anything about us; if anything about who we are or what we do seems strange or is bothering you, just ask."
     She waited a moment. "Yes, something is bothering me, but you better not tell your leader what I'm about to say."
     "Fine. What is it?" I asked.
     "Is Mike a good leader?" she asked.
     "Why do you ask?"
     "What do you mean by why do I ask?! I'm not going to follow a stupid leader into battle!" she yelled at me. She calmed herself before continuing, "Because of him, those two men almost killed us. I know he's sick, but I don't want to be put in a situation like that again."
     Well, in this case, I shouldn't tell Mike what I'm about to say because he'd punch me if he heard.
     "He's not stupid, but he's not really experienced yet."
     "Then why is he leading all of you?" she asked.
     That's a pretty good question. I've questioned it myself.
     "There's a few reasons. I could lead, but I choose not to and Mike's a lot smarter and level headed than most of the other members."
     "Wait. You choose not to?"
     "I don't like the idea of having all of the decisions I make dictate whether someone lives or dies. Awhile ago, due to some poor decisions and a betrayal of one of my companions, a former group I had all ended up dying except for me."
     "Well, you sure are building up your group," she said in a sarcastic tone. "Why in the world should I stay with you guys?"
     "So we're not perfect. Why don't we get off the subject of my group and talk about you; if you're so great, why are you looking into joining up with other survivors?"
     She appeared a little phased by the question. "For security."
     "What? Can't protect yourself?" I asked tauntingly.
     "I can defend myself fine. Watch!"
     Evie stood up and drew a throwing knife slowly, showing it to me and then threw it at a far off tree. It hit it and sunk into the bark. Her skill and speed were impressive. I drew a knife of my own, a thin pocket knife, showing it to her and threw it at the same tree. It hit the tree a little bit lower than her's, but it sunk in as well.
     "So you have some skill with throwing knives. So do I. I noticed you don't have a gun though." She gave me a look that told me she thought I was a jerk. "How long do you think it'll be before your staring down the barrel of a gun and all you'll have is a knife?"
     "I've looked out for myself just fine up until now. I don't need you or your friends," she said very firmly.
     "No, but you need what we have to offer. We have food, supplies, guns, and people; all the things that could make your life easier and I know you understand just how vulnerable you are when you're by yourself."
     "I have Sam with me," was her response.
     "Oh, and what's he going to do. Lick your enemies to death." I knelt down to look at Sam. I noticed that he never looks at me for very long. I even stared directly at him and waved my hand in front of his field of vision. It would only distract him for a moment before he went back to whatever he was doing. It was as if to him, I wasn't even there. I stood back up to end my argument with her.
     "One thing I can say about this group is that we don't leave friends behind. If any one of them were in trouble, I'd go and help them, even if what stood in my way meant certain death. Can you say that about anyone you ever knew."
     She'd been avoiding eye contact with me for a while. She sat down and looked at Sam while I went to get our knives. When I returned, I heard her mumble the words, "I'll stay for the time being at least."
     It was good enough for me. From there, I answered her other questions about the group and I got around to asking about her past and where she got Sam. I listened intently, but I can't remember what she or I said very well so I'm not going to write down a half true story (I'm surprised I remembered as much of our conversation as I did. First impressions I guess). It started to get dark so we headed back to camp. One thing she said to me was troubling though. She asked something along the lines of "Are you sure Mike is alright?" Well, he's sick so no, but maybe she meant something else, perhaps on his mental state.
     Well, I think it would be good to have her with us. Unlike the others, she seems to have combat skills and probably has a lot more to offer though I didn't ask if she could even use a gun. If that's the case, I guess tomorrow is training day!

- Jack's Diary

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Mike's Diary - day 50 "Old Childish Group Leader"

Life, life, life. It is indeed the most beautiful, yet tragic thing. It's hard to live without something to fight for, but now I guess I have people on my side who support me, but Lexi... 
    That is all I've been thinking since last night. I heard Jack said good night to me, I didn't say anything, yet I smiled without him realizing, I just can't believe how much I was needed by others. He went into his tent to sleep while I thought in my head If I die, let it be now. I then fell asleep outside for a couple hours then woke up to a scream,
     "FUCKKKK! HELP ME!"
It came from the little girl's tent. I rushed inside her tent and saw a craze on top of her body trying together a piece of her. Then, that instinct, to protect her just came to me. I pulled the craze out of the tent and hit its head with my crowbar several times to make sure that it's dead. I was breathing heavily, and came back to her.
     "Thanks."
     "mhmmm... no sweat." I was hesitated to respond, but I didn't want to be rude. Jack came, then the others.
     "You gu--" Jack was about to ask me, but I cut his words by pointing at the little girl, and whispered,
     "I'm okay. Get the little girl."
     "Name is FUCKING JULIE by the way! And I'm fine thank you very much!" Said the little girl. I ignored it (so obvious). I went back outside on the top of the trunk, drink some water, adjust watch the landscape, feel the breeze of the wind, and the smell of wild weed. Again, I just can't keep Lexi out of my damn mind.
     "What's our next step?" Jack asked
     "Deliver the package." I said
     "I'm a person old man!"
     "Either you shutup or you don't call me that."
     "Man fuck you too."
     "Shut it you both, or I'm gonna put you on these car for the whole trip and the others including me in the trunk." Jack said. I gave Jack the "You fucking kidding me" look while she did the same to Jack.
     "NO!" Julie and I said it at the same time.
     "Mike you're ffucking 24 years old, stop acting like that, you guys make the perfect siblings." Jack said, I didn't respond, especially when he knows what happened to Lexi, he really shouldn't have said that.
     "Pack up! We're going." I said
     "You're driving, Julie! Take the passenger seat." Jack said, fuck this I thought. We packed up and I drove the car. Julie and I didn't talk, yet didn't bother to attempt a conversation.
     "Sorry, you lost her." She said
     "Who." I said, then she had that were look, and didn't say anything else. It's not that I don't like Julie, I do. I just don't want accept the fact that she has to go with th vapors later on (once I'm attached to her like I was to Lexi, there's no turning back). No one has noticed this however, but I think Jack might be able to tell myfeeling, since he's pretty experienced in life. I just kept driving the truck, avoiding several craze, humm some songs, and all that boring stuff. Until the truck ran out of gas. Oh how great I thought, thank God we're in a city now, many cars, buildings, houses, stores, perhaps we can loot some good stuff.
     "You actually don't mind Julie to be with don't you?" Jack said (how surprising.) I didn't answer that of course, and continue unpacking. We set up the tent in the middle of the road. Julie went by herself into a store to gather some stuff, while we were busy looking for her. I saw her came back with some painkillers, I right away yelled at her,
     "What do you think you're doing? It's dangerous to go alone. You don't do stuff like that unless I say so understand?"
     "But?!"
     "Do you understand!!"
     "Yes. Old man."
     "D-dd-don't call me that. Argh..." while I point my finger at her.
Jack and the others just chuckled, I don't see why it's funny. After that incident, Jack whispered to me,
     "See, you care."
Again, I didn't't answer. I went back to the truck to keep a look out, while the others were in a circle chatting. I don't gather with te group that much anymore so I wouldn't know what they are chatting about, or secrets that they're not telling me. Oh well, I've changed. I don't know why, I'm mourning, yet I am happy with the group safe for now. Now, I'm just that childish old group leader who cares about others but don't wanna show it. I'm falling asleep, Julie was chatting with Jack about something, then to Jess, then back to Jack... oh my... why the hell do I care so fucking much, then I fell asleep as the group was still chatting.

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Day 45 - "Hope it Stays this Way"

     I can see that Jack is pretty pissed because I called him a fucking monster the other day, and I can't, well we can't keep going until everybody is cool with each other, so of course. I have to man up about it and apologize (I think that's the best thing to do). We drove for miles and miles, and Jack was there sitting in the passenger seat with his gun laid down on his thighs, looking outside the windows.
     "Hey man, look..." I said
Jack looked at me
     "I'm sorry for being so harsh, and mouthy with you yesterday. I mean, I just don't like it to see other people getting brutally murdered by that. I understand that you were mad for whatever reason, but c'mon now." I said
     "Yeah, it's cool."
     "Why did you do that anyways?"
     "Because." He said, and he stopped. I can say right now that he doesn't really want to talk. He was just sitting still looking at the road, and sometimes at the back to make sure everything is fine.
     " Look Mike, I've been wanting to tell you this, but you gotta stop putting your own ass in danger. Stop going alone and doing stuff alone like last time." He said to me.
Yeah yeah, I admit it, that is one of my flaws, I don't really want anyone to follow me around sometimes (including Lexi) because I just feel like putting them in danger will cause me more than just my own life.
     "Yes. But I just don't want people to follow me around sometimes." I said
     "By going alone without saying anything means that you're putting everybody's life in danger because then I gotta look for you, well somebody else might be worried about you. Lexi, Victor, Jessie, your brother. Hey man look, don't get yourself killed. I was panicked too when you were a hostage. We need you, the base needs you. Though I have to say right now that you should be in charge of the whole base, no offense to Moses." He said.
     "Couldn't do it without everybody's help, especially you. You've contributed a lot, and I thank you fo-."
     "WATCH OUT!"
I dodged a cutter, and now the RV flipped over. I unbuckled my seat belt and stepped outside the RV as soon as possible.
    "Jack go grab the others." I said, he nodded as if he knew that I was going to distract the cutter, then I took his gun.
I ran out, fired his gun into the air distracting the cutter, then I lead him into the jungle. Thank god it's not yet dawn, I can still see what's going on around me. I ran as fast as I could knowing that cutters are pretty slow. I stopped, and hid behind a tree, and the cutter just kept on going. My worry is not getting killed but getting back together with a group. With my sense of direction (I'm pretty good at it) I was able to find my way back to the RV. The gasoline is leaking and there is no way that we're going to use that. It's busted. I figured that if we stay here for the night, the cutter might come back (assuming he knows his directions), so the group and I decided to walk another mile to set up a camp. Now, we are here, in the middle of nowhere, trying to deliver this message to the Valors.
     We are sitting down, Victor stupidly brought his ukulele to play, Jessie sings, Jack is chatting with Lexi (Whatever the hell they're talking about), I'm here writing this journal. Everyone's so happy in this hell, I guess because we're all together, and I really hope it stays this way.

-Mike's Diary

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